well, lately i have been babysitting everyday, studying for this nclex exam for this coming march 14th, and working out! thats pretty much been my daily life! i am just finishing up the first month of the Insanity workout program. i must say, that is a tough work out! for not being in shape at all (due to sitting on my butt all day while i would study during nursing school and taking naps whenever possible) i have done really well! i feel a big difference with my body and muscles! i actually feel like a have abs (under the flab...i guess i could call them "fl-abs" haha!) i am really trying though! i need to feel good in my whites (and i don't mean scrubs!!!)
job searching hasn't gone that well though. i am trying not to be discouraged. most recent graduate nurses (without prior tech positions) don't get a position right away until they pass the nclex. so once that happens, i will *hopefully* get something so i can get started and stop being so nervous about this whole "career-job-out-of-comfort-zone" situation. it has really been hitting me hard! i can't believe i am at the point of my life i have been dreaming about! i am so excited what life is going to bring next! i just need to do it! i have just always been so nervous about change. what scares me the most is rejection and negativity. i know i am going to be a big spaz when i start my nursing career...and in school, they teach about lateral violence and how experienced nurses treat their young and blah blah blah...and that kind of stuff makes me worried! i don't want people to be mad at me or disappointed! and most of all, do something wrong! i am going to be working in the health care field..with people's lives! real lives! but i need to remember my clinical skills. i did real awesome throughout my clinical nursing experience. the only thing i rarely messed up on was documenting (that is documenting too much!..i love to write novels and use correct wording!) but other than that, i did wonderful. even with 3 patients. phew thats tough..and one day i will have 5...or 6! oh gosh, can't think about that now! lol
there are some things in life i just need to get over. and i will. i am young and i am learning all about life. its crazy though, to think about one day i will be 40 and maybe have life figured out by then (gosh, i hope). as for now, i still feel 17! i just need to take it day by day.
i found a quote on Pinterest the other day and it surely relates to my life and stepping out of my "comfort zone" ....it is by Eleanor Roosevelt:
"Do one thing that scares you every day."
as for the wedding planning, (planning -aka "looking on Pinterest"- always cheers me up when i have a crappy mood), i have the date, location,engagement photos, save the dates on the way, photographer, and videographer! as i cross those off my list, i just add more! i just can't wait! 10 months away!
here are some lovely photos my dear friend Ashlyn took of us! she is just getting started in her photography business facebook.com/MKphotography2013 and she did fabulous!
i love my handsome fiancé!
so glad he's mine!
<3
